費茲傑羅的《冬之夢》(Winter Dreams)於1922年首次刊載於《大都會雜誌》(Metropolitan Magazine)。這篇小說被譽為他最好的短篇小說之一,而三年後,它成了家喻戶曉的《大亨小傳》(The Great Gatsby)的藍圖。在閱讀過程中,你會發現後者中的男女主角及兩人之間剪不斷理還亂的關係就是Dexter Green和Judy Jones的翻版。兩個故事中,出身較低的男主角都靠自己白手起家,躋身上流世界,但儘管為心儀的女主角犧牲一切(甚至生命),仍無法贏得她們的心。無論是Daisy或Judy,也都被描繪成風情萬種、擅長玩弄男人於股掌之間的(壞)女人,最後也都如被作者蓄意報復般,困在不幸的婚姻中年華老去。
再次閱讀費茲傑羅的小說,內心不禁又浮現這個疑問:關於情與愛的得失,就最基本的小說情節而論,似乎和瓊瑤小說、民視鄉土劇或中視花系列相去不遠,但為何他的小說能夠成為文學的經典?不久我便迷失在他精準的語言中了──作者鋪陳兩人初次約會的情景,就像他自己早已分飾兩角,經歷(或排練)過無數次了似的。或許他不只是文學家,更是位戀愛/失戀達人。
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晚餐時,她陷入了一陣憂鬱,這讓德克斯特感到有點坐立難安。無論她沙啞的聲音發出了什麼不耐煩的聲音都令他心焦,無論她對誰微笑──對他, 對著雞肝,或對著空氣──都令他不安,覺得這抹微笑可能不是因為她真的愉快,或甚至覺得有趣。當她的紅唇往下一撇,與其說那是個微笑,不如說是個親吻的邀請。
晚餐過後,她領他到漆黑的陽台,刻意地改變了兩人的相處氣氛。
「你介意我哭一下嗎?」她問。
「我怕我讓你覺得無聊,」他很快回應道。
「你沒有,我喜歡你,只是我下午過得很糟糕。有個我喜歡的男人,今天下午突然跟我說其實他很窮。但以前一點徵兆也沒有。這聽起來是不是很世俗?」
「也許他害怕告訴你實話。」
「也許是吧,」她答道。「他從一開始就沒做對。你看,假如我本來就知道他很窮──其實我也曾為一堆窮男人瘋狂過,而且還完全打算嫁給他們。但在現在這情況下,我根本沒這樣想過他,而我對他的好感也沒有強到能抵抗這個驚嚇。就好像一個女孩冷靜地告訴未婚夫她其實是個寡婦一樣。他可能對寡婦沒有意見,但──」
「讓我們從一開始就做對,」她突然打斷自己,「所以,你是誰?」
那一瞬間德克斯特遲疑了一下,接著說:
「我是無名小卒,」他宣布道,「我的人生志業還得看未來發展而定。」
「那你窮嗎?」
「不窮,」他坦率地說,「在這西北方,我賺的錢可能比任何一個和我同齡的人還要多。我知道這聽起來一定很討人厭,但你剛才建議我要從一開始就做對。」
一陣短暫的靜默後,她笑了,嘴角往下撇,她不知不覺地靠近他,抬頭看進他的雙眼。德克斯特吞了口口水,屏息等待這場實驗發生──他們的雙唇將神秘地結合,製造出令人無法預料的化合物。然後他明白了──她給予他缺乏承諾但令人滿足的吻,向他展現內心巨大而深沉的悸動。這些吻在他內心激起了並非源於對修補的渴求,而是對饜足的慾念。這些吻就像施捨,因毫無保留而讓人匱乏。
沒過多久,他就決定他想得到裘蒂瓊斯,只因他是個自負又好勝的小男孩。
(原文參考)
During dinner she slipped into a moody depression which gave Dexter a feeling of uneasiness. Whatever petulance she uttered in her throaty voice worried him. Whatever she smiled at—at him, at a chicken liver, at nothing—it disturbed him that her smile could have no root in mirth, or even in amusement. When the scarlet corners of her lips curved down, it was less a smile than an invitation to a kiss.
Then, after dinner, she led him out on the dark sun-porch and deliberately changed the atmosphere.
“Do you mind if I weep a little?” she said.
“I'm afraid I'm boring you,” he responded quickly.
“You're not. I like you. But I've just had a terrible afternoon. There was a man I cared about, and this afternoon he told me out of a clear sky that he was poor as a church-mouse. He'd never even hinted it before. Does this sound horribly mundane?”
“Perhaps he was afraid to tell you.”
“Suppose he was,” she answered. “He didn't start right. You see, if I'd thought of him as poor—well, I've been mad about loads of poor men, and fully intended to marry them all. But in this case, I hadn't thought of him that way, and my interest in him wasn't strong enough to survive the shock. As if a girl calmly informed her fiancé that she was a widow. He might not object to widows, but--
“Let's start right,” she interrupted herself suddenly. “Who are you, anyhow?”
For a moment Dexter hesitated. Then:
“I'm nobody,” he announced. “My career is largely a matter of futures.”
“Are you poor?”
“No,” he said frankly, “I'm probably making more money than any man my age in the Northwest. I know that's an obnoxious remark, but you advised me to start right.”
There was a pause. Then she smiled and the corners of her mouth drooped and an almost imperceptible sway brought her closer to him, looking up into his eyes. A lump rose in Dexter's throat, and he waited breathless for the experiment, facing the unpredictable compound that would form mysteriously from the elements of their lips. Then he saw--she communicated her excitement to him, lavishly, deeply, with kisses that were not a promise but a fulfillment. They aroused in him not hunger demanding renewal but surfeit that would demand more surfeit…kisses that were like charity, creating want by holding back nothing at all.
It did not take him many hours to decide that he had wanted Judy Jones ever since he was a proud, desirous little boy.
圖片來源
再次閱讀費茲傑羅的小說,內心不禁又浮現這個疑問:關於情與愛的得失,就最基本的小說情節而論,似乎和瓊瑤小說、民視鄉土劇或中視花系列相去不遠,但為何他的小說能夠成為文學的經典?不久我便迷失在他精準的語言中了──作者鋪陳兩人初次約會的情景,就像他自己早已分飾兩角,經歷(或排練)過無數次了似的。或許他不只是文學家,更是位戀愛/失戀達人。
************ ************ ************ ************ ************ ************ **********
晚餐時,她陷入了一陣憂鬱,這讓德克斯特感到有點坐立難安。無論她沙啞的聲音發出了什麼不耐煩的聲音都令他心焦,無論她對誰微笑──對他, 對著雞肝,或對著空氣──都令他不安,覺得這抹微笑可能不是因為她真的愉快,或甚至覺得有趣。當她的紅唇往下一撇,與其說那是個微笑,不如說是個親吻的邀請。
晚餐過後,她領他到漆黑的陽台,刻意地改變了兩人的相處氣氛。
「你介意我哭一下嗎?」她問。
「我怕我讓你覺得無聊,」他很快回應道。
「你沒有,我喜歡你,只是我下午過得很糟糕。有個我喜歡的男人,今天下午突然跟我說其實他很窮。但以前一點徵兆也沒有。這聽起來是不是很世俗?」
「也許他害怕告訴你實話。」
「也許是吧,」她答道。「他從一開始就沒做對。你看,假如我本來就知道他很窮──其實我也曾為一堆窮男人瘋狂過,而且還完全打算嫁給他們。但在現在這情況下,我根本沒這樣想過他,而我對他的好感也沒有強到能抵抗這個驚嚇。就好像一個女孩冷靜地告訴未婚夫她其實是個寡婦一樣。他可能對寡婦沒有意見,但──」
「讓我們從一開始就做對,」她突然打斷自己,「所以,你是誰?」
那一瞬間德克斯特遲疑了一下,接著說:
「我是無名小卒,」他宣布道,「我的人生志業還得看未來發展而定。」
「那你窮嗎?」
「不窮,」他坦率地說,「在這西北方,我賺的錢可能比任何一個和我同齡的人還要多。我知道這聽起來一定很討人厭,但你剛才建議我要從一開始就做對。」
一陣短暫的靜默後,她笑了,嘴角往下撇,她不知不覺地靠近他,抬頭看進他的雙眼。德克斯特吞了口口水,屏息等待這場實驗發生──他們的雙唇將神秘地結合,製造出令人無法預料的化合物。然後他明白了──她給予他缺乏承諾但令人滿足的吻,向他展現內心巨大而深沉的悸動。這些吻在他內心激起了並非源於對修補的渴求,而是對饜足的慾念。這些吻就像施捨,因毫無保留而讓人匱乏。
沒過多久,他就決定他想得到裘蒂瓊斯,只因他是個自負又好勝的小男孩。
(原文參考)
During dinner she slipped into a moody depression which gave Dexter a feeling of uneasiness. Whatever petulance she uttered in her throaty voice worried him. Whatever she smiled at—at him, at a chicken liver, at nothing—it disturbed him that her smile could have no root in mirth, or even in amusement. When the scarlet corners of her lips curved down, it was less a smile than an invitation to a kiss.
Then, after dinner, she led him out on the dark sun-porch and deliberately changed the atmosphere.
“Do you mind if I weep a little?” she said.
“I'm afraid I'm boring you,” he responded quickly.
“You're not. I like you. But I've just had a terrible afternoon. There was a man I cared about, and this afternoon he told me out of a clear sky that he was poor as a church-mouse. He'd never even hinted it before. Does this sound horribly mundane?”
“Perhaps he was afraid to tell you.”
“Suppose he was,” she answered. “He didn't start right. You see, if I'd thought of him as poor—well, I've been mad about loads of poor men, and fully intended to marry them all. But in this case, I hadn't thought of him that way, and my interest in him wasn't strong enough to survive the shock. As if a girl calmly informed her fiancé that she was a widow. He might not object to widows, but--
“Let's start right,” she interrupted herself suddenly. “Who are you, anyhow?”
For a moment Dexter hesitated. Then:
“I'm nobody,” he announced. “My career is largely a matter of futures.”
“Are you poor?”
“No,” he said frankly, “I'm probably making more money than any man my age in the Northwest. I know that's an obnoxious remark, but you advised me to start right.”
There was a pause. Then she smiled and the corners of her mouth drooped and an almost imperceptible sway brought her closer to him, looking up into his eyes. A lump rose in Dexter's throat, and he waited breathless for the experiment, facing the unpredictable compound that would form mysteriously from the elements of their lips. Then he saw--she communicated her excitement to him, lavishly, deeply, with kisses that were not a promise but a fulfillment. They aroused in him not hunger demanding renewal but surfeit that would demand more surfeit…kisses that were like charity, creating want by holding back nothing at all.
It did not take him many hours to decide that he had wanted Judy Jones ever since he was a proud, desirous little boy.
圖片來源